Cherry Shock

Underappreciated and undersexed!!!

2009-06-16T19:33:00.000-07:00

The title says it all

> _ <

Inadequate

2009-06-15T08:51:00.000-07:00

I've been feeling very inadequate lately > _ <

ahh i don't know what's wrong with me but for one thing, i seriously need my confidence back cuz wth!!

I keep thinking i'm not pretty enough, not skinny enough, don't make enough *sigh*

I have so much to offer!! But, at the same time I feel like I lack so much.

My self esteem right now is down the drainnn ahhh x _ x need to get that back up.

stop looking at flaws!!

2009-06-11T07:02:00.000-07:00

I'm really sick of hearing about people's flaws!!

Example:

Person A: "Oh that person's really cute!"

Person B: "Not really...they have stumpy legs."

ArghH so what!!!

So what if I wear a push up bra, have stretch marks, and have a tendency to wear fake eyelashes :D It doesn't matter!! Omg.

If looks matter to people so much, find someone else who you'll like to look at more, and leave the rest of us in peace.

Stop looking at people's flaws and start seeing the good!! They probably have a really great personality and are really really fun people!! You never know!

Don't value too much in what people look like...in time it'll fade and then what will you do? Leave the person you were with for so long, for something better to look at?

What to do when you get beer goggled!! Aka beer goggle effect

2009-06-10T10:50:00.000-07:00

It's happened to some of us. We'd like to forget it. Some of us regret it. And some of us have really messed up friends (AHEM) that like to remind us of our past deeds, sometimes at the most embarrassing moments possible.

Sadly, beer goggles afflicts over 80% of the population (totally made up number). Why does it affect so many people?? Well, there are those that made really poor judgements on their choice of men/women and in realizing their poor decision, blame it on the a-a-a-alcohol ( baby ). Then, there are people who get so drunk, they can't see clearly and then make out/hook up with the nearest guy (usually really ugly, balding, and has really bad B.O.) or girl (typically unattractive).

First of all, I'd like to ask the friends of those who clearly have the debilitating disorder known as beer goggles, WHY DO YOU GUYS/GIRLS NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP THIS!!!

I know for a fact (because I have done this) that I will recount a story of XYZ making out with ABC and saying, "omgg remember when you made out with ABC? GROSS!" and start laughing, when I knew that night I could've prevented this. But I didn't. I should've. And now everytime I see my friend shifting towards the back of a bar/club, I ask her, "Really???" and if she thinks he's good enough and not ugly, then whatever...Just make sure that she's thinking with a clear head. But, in all safety, please make sure you have a view of your friend at all times and try to have her come home with you! Not all guys at clubs/bars are nice guys and a lot of them don't have good intentions!!

I've had beer goggles like twice in my life. I try to forget it!! But, sometimes these moments come up when you're having lunch with your friends or something. It's especially embarrassing when they recount the story to someone they just introduced you to!

Best thing to do in this situation? Just pretend you have no idea what your friend is saying. LOL. Total betrayal, but so what? Not everything that happened in your friendship is a free for all for everyone to know.

Example:

Your Friend: "So, there was this one time when Sandy and I went to the club and she totally made out with this guy, ABC. He was SO ugly! We couldn't believe she did that!"

New friend: "omg really??"

Me: "Whose abc?? What are you talking about?" [ in an all serious face. bad liars, practice this]

Sometimes, this doesn't work. But, if you keep reinforcing the idea that you were never there, your friend should get the hint. If not...then...

PLAN B:

Me: "OHH you mean ABC? Omg, he was a really nice guy! You know looks aren't everything, you know. He took me on the most romantic date afterwards. He was so considerate and charming. But, he had to go back to wherever he was from."

SCORE! You're back on top. :D

Besides...this could've been true. Looks can be repulsive and scary sometimes. But, even Shrek was a loving guy!! Giving them a chance isn't a bad thing!

Remember! If you suffer from beer goggles, or think that this has never happened to you and will not happen to you...you are wrong. It will. Just like sex, practice safe alcohol drinking. The only safe alcohol..is NO alcohol. LOL.

Though, that would ruin your fun and life experience wouldn't it??

bored at work

2009-04-14T08:21:00.001-07:00

I am seriously bored out of my mind at work right now...

I have a meeting at 1:30pm. but after that...it's back to boredom.

o _ o WHEN DID MY LIFE BECOME LIKE THIS???

I'm not a dumb asian girl

2009-03-04T12:17:00.000-08:00

I'm not dumb and I'm not retarded. When will you people learn?

Seriously, I am sick of being underestimated and having my opinions undervalued because people think I'm dumb. Look, if I'm telling you that there are lots of people dying in Darfur, there is a 99% chance that I am right. So, don't look at me like I'm dumb and say, "Yea right. You don't know anything about the world. You're so cuteee and little." And then go and google it yourself, then proceed to give me praises on how I'm so well learned in the world, and I should "keep up the good work."

I am a smart person. I've outgrown the dumb blond phase a couple of years ago. Too bad some of you guys didn't. When the hell will you people learn? I'm not gonna play dumb and not "talk as smart" because I'm an "azn girl", so I should "TyPE LiKE THiS." The fact that I'm speaking up about this should indicate to you that I have some higher level of mental acuity, that some of you guys obviously lack.

If you can't get used to the fact that I've always been smarter and more articulate than you, I don't see us having a long friendship together.

Besides, I'm freakin 22 years old. How weirdo would it be for me to speak like I'm like, "la dee da~~ unicorns and butterflies~~", in the words of my friend Lai and the Huang family. And it's so true! I'm not a kid anymore. Just cuz i'm 5'1 and I used to act all cute, does not mean that I don't have the same intelligence as you do. Stop treating me like I'm an immature, dumb kid, because I've stopped treating myself as one too.

I just wish some of you could reciprocate the same idea.

I wish I look cute in the winter

2009-03-02T10:05:00.000-08:00

Props to those girls in the winter rockin' those mini skirts, boots with the fur, and cute little winter furry jackets. Because its really really hard to look hot and not be cold in the winter. I know, cuz I used to do that... Okay, I still have those boots with the fur. LOL.

But, it may be the fact that I've gotten older, but no way in hell am I walking around in NYC in 30 degree weather in a mini skirt and little jacket anymore! I prefer looking like a big, fluffy sheep. All winter long.

I don't know how those girls do it...cuz when I did it, I was freezing my ass off, fronting like crazy. Telling everyone, "Oh, I'm not cold. This is how I roll. All the time." If you believed me, you were a dumbass. Cuz when no one was looking, I was shivering to create enough kinetic energy to sustain me long enough...so that when people were actually looking, I looked really bad ass in the winter.

In the words of Barack Obama to the big spending bail out companies, "Those days are over!" I would love to look cute and hot in the winter...but I really can't do it anymore. Long pants, ugly boots, big fluffy sweaters, and giant scarves...that's what I'm wearing nowadays for the winter.

For those girls that continue to wear it, I know what you have to do to look that cute! Is it worth it though? For the sake of appearances? So that the next week you have to stay in bed, cuz you wore nothing the day before?

Speaking out against abuse

2009-02-20T17:00:00.000-08:00

It really bothers me that there are people that are actually sympathizing to Chris Brown. Yes, I'm writing about Chris Brown.

I taught a women's self defense class a while back and I took a lot of women's studies courses. It's really important to me that women know their self worth. There are so many of us out there that are victimized, sexually and physically abused, and made to feel like we are nothing but objects.

We are more than just a face, an ass, or boobs. So when I heard that Chris Brown beat up Rihanna, and my little 16 year old sister, was taking Chris Brown's side, I was infuriated. At first I thought there was something seriously wrong with the way we raised her. To think a man could beat a woman like a rag doll and think that it is okay for him to do it. But, then she told me all her friends think Rihanna is a slut and she deserved to be "fucked up".

Can you believe that shit?

Something is wrong with society and our young generation for them to feel that it is okay for a man to beat up a woman. Did we forget the obstacles that women around the world faced so we can get a little bit of rights like: voting, rights to choose, and equal opportunity at jobs? It always amazes me how uneducated some of our youth are.

Women are still raped, beaten, kidnapped, and forced into slavery to this day. Just because we live in a country where "these things don't happen": THEY DO. They also happen around the world. Every single day.

Now, do you still think its okay for Chris Brown to get away with beating up a woman? Just because he's a celebrity or "he must have reasons for it".

Don't give me that bullshit. I learned a long time ago...that my self respect and dignity is worth much more than anything. I hope Rihanna and other young women around the world know this too.

Weird guy on AIM

2008-12-12T12:37:00.000-08:00

So, yesterday I got this weird message from this guy named enyceazn555 aka enyce86snoopy. He was pretending to be a guy named William Ng and claims to have gone to my high school. He says he goes to SJU on facebook, but little did he know that my friends know the REAL Willaim Ng from SJU.

Then, he proceeds to tell me that my screen name has been on his buddy list for a long time. He also admitted that I didn't know him. So, what was my screen name doing on his buddy list? When I asked him to tell me who he was because it's weird that he knows everything about me and I don't know anything about him!! That is stalker status in my book, and many other people's as well.

It was really weird. Then I told him, "Oh I see, you are pretending to be someone else. That's not cool man." In which case, he signs off / blocks me. Then, I find out he has another screen name and of course, the other screen name is online. So, he is probably watching me from there as well.

Not cool dude. Whoever you are, you should stop pretending to be someone you're not and own up to whoever you really are. If you're as stalker as I think you are, you are probably reading this right now...

To those avid readers out there, I doubt there are any.....take this as a warning, keep your personal information including screen names set on private in all your public domains including xanga, myspace, and facebook.

This dude really weirded me out. He asked if I was scared, but I was not. I know how to deal with people like that, just ignore them and if it gets really threatening, call the police.

Three belts & a rocker tee :D

2008-12-11T13:00:00.000-08:00

I am loving this punk look~ I am wearing three belts, black skinny jeans, and a rocker graphic tee tucked in. I love it!!

All I need is a chain necklace with a lock on it!! Here's a pic!

Memorial Sloan Interview Update

2008-12-06T00:47:00.000-08:00

Bombed it!! My typing speed is apparently 92 wpm, and my Microsoft Word knowledge was great.

Just...there were more experienced candidates than me.

Why bother calling me for an interview then? Like, why????

Mount Sinai Interview

2008-12-04T16:52:00.000-08:00

I think today's interview actually went really well. The interviewer was so friendly and really chill and I think I really connected with her. Obviously, I did research on the topic before actually going to the interview, so I was so prepared and armed with knowledge. But, I know there is a lot of competition out there, one of them being my friend who is experienced in the research field.

I really want this job, and even though I wish him luck and all, because he wants it the same as me, I want it more > _ > . It's not fair that this market is so bad that a lot entry-level job seekers like me are having such a hard time. The competition is so tough! I wonder what it will narrow down to or what they even judge?

My attire? My make up? Or my interview / job experiences? I have no clue! I'm sure I did my best. I prepped myself before the interview and everything...even ate a cookie to calm myself down.

We'll see what happens. If anyone out there has a job in the general NYC area, please let me know! One that isn't illegal or shady, or involves taking off clothes > _ > because that's not cool. I'm a psych major, so research interests me. :] Thanks!

Corset!! and tutu!!

2008-12-03T21:02:00.000-08:00

So, today, i bought a corset! Me, being a really small person, had to tailor it to fit. I basically broke apart the shirt and resewed it so it'll fit me. :D Here are some pics!

Hello!!! :D In my living room haha. Hence the fridge and the backwards 3 for the calendar...

Wearing my corset with jeans, and a studded belt, for a really punk rocker look. Black skinny jeans, of course.

Or With a tutu, fishnet, and lace pumps.

Or Just with a plane tutu!! :D I love my black tutu, I bought it from H&M. It's become of my favorite pieces in my closet!

What do you think??

Interviews!

2008-12-02T12:08:00.000-08:00

Scored two interviews...

Research coordinator at Mount Sinai and a secretarial position at Memorial Sloan Kettering. Wish me luck!

just graduated and don't know what to do? am i the only one?

2008-12-02T10:32:00.000-08:00

well i graduated from Bing in august. Now, I'm trying to figure out what I want to do with my life! Yea, I've been applying to jobs, going to interviews, and receiving no responses! But, the economy is to blame and maybe some tweaking of my resume. But, seriously I've just been applying to random jobs available and everything! I have no focus. I hoped that I would get a job and fall into it, but I keep thinking I don't want to end up just working at a company for the rest of my life.

I have bigger aspirations, just I don't know what. But, I know I can do better and make more out of myself. I just don't know what I want to do.

So, as of now, I've been applying to jobs and internships...get a feel of different fields if I do get a job and then decide if I like that industry or not.

It's definitely going to take a long ass time for me to figure out what I want to do. I was "supposed" to go on to med school, I even took the stupid MCATs, but it's not what I want to do...definitely not.

new leather skirt!! and speed dating...

2008-12-01T18:54:00.000-08:00

I got a leather skirt and striped leggings! I found the faux leather skirt at H&M, when it's always sold out. But, today I was really lucky and found my size. The striped leggings I got at Search & Destroy, a vintage punk shop in St. Mark's...on sale. :D Here's a pic!

I tried speed dating with my friend Shih Mei, the other day. Like many people, I was scared it was going to be a loser fest with people who were socially retarded. I was really surprised! Everyone was, the very least, decent looking. My age group 21-25, was pretty cool. All the guys were really interesting and I met some really cool ppl. Like, fifteen guys in two hours.

One of them was actually this guy who traveled a lot for work and he wasn't socially awkward, he just didn't have the time to meet new friends in every city he went to, so he tries speed dating to get to know people. I thought he was really cool cuz he gets to go to Tokyo. lol. Yea, i'm so jealous.

So, I am actually glad I went. It was a new experience for me.

Oh, yea. Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

cute leggings!!! and what did i get myself into ...

2008-11-20T19:05:00.000-08:00

Look!! Cute checker leggings! I took a picture of them when I tried them on..thats why it looks like i'm bending...because I am!! LOL. but, yea they look pretty retro and cute. Sadly, I returned them because I looked like a mime. Yes. A mime. I'm going to stick stripes... Anyways, here's the picture! What do you think?

well i went to the job interview... the YAI mental health counselor...

and I am not really sure I want to do that kind of job anymore. yes, i'll have a role in counseling and giving therapy to the patients. but, the patients i am dealing with are grown men and women, who are sexually active and are developmentally disabled. that means, i will have to care for their grooming, bathing, dressing, ointment application and medicine, feeding...the list goes on.

i feel like i would be a home care aid. i have no problem with working with an older population of developmentally disabled people, i just have a problem with the whole helping them shower and dress thing. i am just not that comfortable with seeing mens', especially geriatric, private parts...knowing they are sexually active people. that kind of intimidates me...

so, we'll see...if i get this job or not. i am still going to interviews though, definitely, for the time being. my goal is to get a job by january 2009. wish me luck!

i voted today!

2008-11-04T18:36:00.000-08:00

I got up my lazy butt and voted for the first time today!

I voted for Obama.

When I voted I felt very empowered for some reason, like I actually helped even though everyone knows the electoral college votes for the president.

I will definitely be voting again in the future!

I got my license!!!

2008-10-28T12:47:00.000-07:00

I PASSED MY ROAD TEST and I got the keys to the Lexus, baby.

I can drive wherever I want now!!! Well...with the exception of highways and anywhere else outside queens cuz I haven't learned how to drive on the highway yet. :(

But, other than that, I can go places!! Yay!

My job search continues...

2008-10-25T00:54:00.000-07:00

So after taking a 2 month break ( I graduated in August 2008 ), I finally got off my lazy butt and started looking for jobs. Not working at a deli or as a cashier, but a REAL career. So far, I've been to about 6 interviews, but no responses.

Today, I got a ray of hope! At 3:13 pm, Friday, I received an email from a YAI HR person who wants to meet with me to discuss job opportunities. The position I applied for was assistant psychologist. But, sadly I read the email at 3:30 am today. LOL. So, I emailed her back and left a message on her voicemail.

Wish me luck! I really need it!

Leather!!

2008-10-23T21:52:00.001-07:00

I am loving leather jackets this season. It's everywhere!!

I have the one from Victoria's Secret: the leather corset jacket in XXS. It fits like a glove and the price is really not bad! I got it for $89 (with 25% off coupon). I love it! I wear it with my pink and purple plaid mini dress and it looks really cute.

I also paired it with these really cute faux leather boots :]

I wonder what other people are wearing this fall and winter?